Rattling the Cage Book Review: Be Ready When the Sh*t Goes Down by Forrest Griffin

Saturday, February 25th, 2012 by Tony Reid

I am not what you might call a full on “Doomsday Prepper” but after reading this book I think I might at least be able to survive anything Mother Nature throws at us in the future thanks to our new God, Forrest Griffin. I know for sure I can easily break into and steal a car (Step by step instructions listed by the Griffinator.) I can now set broken bones with ease and thanks to Forrest’s advice I have also decided what animal I would choose to have sex with if it ever came to that. So, I am currently filling my bug out bag and deciding what family members to leave behind as I hop in my fully decked out Vehicle of Death to take it on a trial run to my safe place. Ok, none of that last sentence is true; I am actually sitting behind my laptop typing the words you are reading right now. Far less cool, I know.

The book, although filled with satire and a bunch of tongue in cheek (and dick in mouth) references, has a substantial amount of really good, really useful information in the event the world would end or drastically change due to a number of possible doomsday scenarios. Griffin lists in great detail, step by step instructions on how to survive any possible scenario you find yourself in as the world is crumbling around you. After Forrest shows us how horribly unprepared most of us are for the apocalypse we should pay close attention to his suggestions. He covers all topics from prepping a go bag and escaping to a safe place, transportation needed for your getaway, what food and supplies will be needed, hunting and gathering, weapon usage, mating with humans (if possible), and even creating your very own new world order deep in the hills or ,well, forest. And when I say in great detail, I mean great detail. There were a few uncharacteristically deep and heavy moments toward the end of the book about Forrest actually finding religion and a few childhood stories that seemed somewhat honest and serious. I could be wrong there.

The book was very good, not quite as good as Got Fight?, which was a bit more autobiographical and offered more of a tie to the MMA world but this particular book had much more of a single focus that might not have afforded Forrest the opportunity to freestyle as many dick and fart stories as his first book allowed. If you believe that last sentence then you have not read anything by Forrest Griffin. He will find a way to make you laugh out loud on nearly every single page. He truly has a knack and a natural ability to entertain with his words, I would go as far to say that he is more entertaining with his words than his in cage exploits. If you are too intelligent, too uppity or take yourself too seriously to have a good laugh at a guy who has serious skills not only in the Octagon but writing a funny as hell book then I feel sorry for you, not only do you lead a miserable life but you will also be left behind when the shit does indeed go down.